Peas
by 2queens1prince
Summary: A one shot motivated by another fic in which I try to make your average frozen veggie smut worthy. Yeah, you read that right.


AN: I would like to thank Teaismyqueen for unknowingly providing the inspiration for this masterpiece of smut for smut's sake. After reading about her use of ice lollies, I was forced to admit that I'm just boring and would have used a bag of frozen peas. But, not being willing to admit my total lameness, I decided to prove once and for all that frozen peas can be sexy too. Enjoy.

AN2: I use the term masterpiece very loosely. It's not really.

AN3: Also throwing props to mobazan27, who already read this and wrote the most amazing review that still has me laughing 24 hours later. Even if everyone else who reads this thinks I'm totally off my rocker, I'm still happy.

Prompt: Make frozen peas sexy.

Elizabeth grunted as she hoisted the two overfilled grocery sacks up onto the kitchen island. Everyone was gone, so that meant that she was not only doing the shopping, but she was putting the groceries away as well.

She had her head buried in the freezer trying to make room for the new freezer items, humming to herself, oblivious to anything else. Henry had just returned home and stood in the doorway watching her. Elizabeth moved from the grocery bags on the end of the island to the freezer, her ass swaying to a tune that was only in her head. He blew out a long breath. "Damn, she's hot," he thought to himself. He made his move, stepping in quickly behind her, his large hands settling on her hips, his fingers splayed across her abdomen.

Totally taken off guard, Elizabeth jumped and tossed a bag of frozen peas in the air. Catching the corner of the freezer door, the bag burst open, shooting peas all over the kitchen. "Shit Henry! You scared me half to death." He chuckled and buried his nose in the crook of her neck, planting kisses there.

Sliding his hand down, he gripped the inside of her thigh and she let out a shaky breath. "I think you're about done here," he murmured into her ear, his hand moving up until he met the junction of her leg and torso, pressing against her most intimate parts.

"Not done." She let her head fall back against his shoulder. "Can't let the ice cream melt."

Henry chuckled. "That would be a tragedy." He let her go and she stepped to the island grabbing two half gallon ice cream cartons and set them inside the freezer. "Anything else?" he asked, peering into the paper bags.

"Just canned goods," she said, then grimaced as she stepped on a couple peas. "This is a mess."

"A mess that won't be going anywhere," he smirked. He kicked the freezer door shut with his foot and grabbed Elizabeth around the waist, setting her up on the counter. Pushing her legs apart, he stepped in between them and leaned in to kiss her, but she fell back on her elbows and grinned at him. "Oh? That's the way we're playing this?" He nodded his approval and immediately pushed her shirt up, kissing his way up her belly before burying his face just above the clasp on her bra.

Suddenly, she pushed herself up and kissed him hard. Her tongue forcibly making its way into his mouth. She ran her fingers through his hair, holding his head in place. He roughly grabbed hold of her breast and squeezed eliciting a deep moan. Elizabeth flung herself back silently asking him to go down on her, but just as he pulled away, she caught sight of the clock on the wall behind him. "Shit," she mumbled, grabbing a handful of t-shirt and pulling them to meet. "Kids are due home any time. We'll have to table that."

"Unfortunate," he muttered. "We'll just have to be more discreet." He slipped his hand down the front of her yoga pants and landed squarely on her clit tracing rapid circles. Her hips involuntarily pulled in to meet his hand. Elizabeth fell forward onto Henry's shoulder, her moans growing louder, until her legs trembled and everything stopped. Elizabeth stiffened, her muscles tightening around Henry's fingers, and she let the pleasure was over her.

There was no time for a full recovery, within seconds, Elizabeth had her hand down Henry's track pants stroking him, cupping his balls. Wrapping her fingers around his cock, she pumped him. Reading him, she picked up her speed, gripping him firmly. "Ahhhh," Henry cried, indicating his closeness. Just then, she heard the crunch of gravel as Stevie pulled into the driveway. Knowing they had supplies for the horses, it would be another couple minutes before they made it into the house. She pushed Henry, causing him to take a step back and in one swift motion she slid off the end of the island and had his cock in her mouth sucking him hard, swirling her tongue over his tip. A hoarse growl escaped as he came hard, letting her swallow the evidence.

The door opened at the moment he was tucking himself back into his pants, and Elizabeth pulled him to the floor with her and she began picking up peas. He joined her in the task and the kids hit the doorway to the kitchen and stopped. "What happened?" Ali asked.

Elizabeth kept her head down in an effort to mask her flushed cheeks. "Your father here startled me and I jumped and somehow the bag of peas exploded."

"And then you rolled in them?" Jason asked. "You're covered in smashed peas, Dad. They are all over your t-shirt and in your hair."

Stevie entered behind them, surveyed the situation, including the mess on the counter and her mother's backside. "Rolled in them. Yeah, that's what we are going to call it. You two are so gross." Stevie carefully stepped around them. "Come on nerds. Let's watch TV in my room so they can clean up their mess." Ali and Jason looked a little confused, but followed Stevie up the stairs.

Henry and Elizabeth quickly swept up the stray peas off the floor and wiped off the counters before heading upstairs. As soon as they were in the bedroom, Henry locked the door. "So, now that the kids are occupied, I say we visited that which was tabled earlier." He tugged her shirt over her head and tossed it aside before kissing her passionately.

He reached between them and unhooked her bra. As her breasts escaped the confines of the garment, four peas fell out and bounced on the floor. They both laughed and Elizabeth shrugged. "Things collect there, what can I say?" Henry bent down and picked up the runaway peas, tossing them into the trash can.

Pulling her back flush to his body, he walked them to the bathroom and turned the water on in the shower. "I thought we were revisiting things, not cleaning up." She glanced into the mirror and picked a smashed pea out of her hair.

"I can multitask Dr. McCord," he said, pulling her pants down. She giggled and stepped into the shower, anxiously waiting for him to follow.


End file.
